There has been such a sharp positive change in me that a lot of people (I feel, unfairly) are blaming on pregnancy hormones. I know the real reason this change has happened. And it has embarrassingly only happened from reading a self help book called the 48 laws of power. Nothing more profound than that. Reading this book has encouraged me to go for it, aim higher, work harder and make more money. It’s weird how after living my whole life and not learning that, a book was all it took.
So yeah, it’s not the pregnancy hormones it’s a book I read.
I made a few small life changes and found myself attracting new people and new opportunities. Once I got wind that I could make more money, I was like a blood hound. It sounds greedy, but honestly, only a handful of people have told me I can get anywhere in life and not be poor. As a young twenty something and teen, all anyone told me was how hard life was going to be and how my dreams were unrealistic. Now I know that my dreams actually are not only realistic, but that new opportunities are being presented to me all the time that I didn’t even think were possible for someone like me. My dreams are actually a bit too small and I need to find bigger ones. But terrace culture dictates that you don’t get too full of yourself and being a female culture dictates your dreams must include helping people in some way otherwise u r a bitch. It doesn’t feel ok to admit to dreams that are just for you.
I realised that people surrounding me were holding me back, I didn’t realise this until in the 48 laws of power, I decided to implement ‘you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with’. I started hanging out with more positive, driven people. And it’s not like the people I was hanging out with before were bad people, they were just bad for me and I didn’t realise. Once I started to change, I found that I naturally annoyed the negative people in my life. Even some of my closest family members have fallen out with me. My Aunty no longer speaks to me because I told her that I refuse to see the world as a dangerous and miserable place. (She was trying to tell me about all the dangers that ‘TEH MUSLIMS’ are going to bring for the pending baby).
My friend Tess has found this to be true in her life as well. Some of her closest and oldest friends have decided they’ve grown apart from her now that she is getting free collagen injections and getting free trips to LA. To me she has only changed for the better, but positivity and success are irritating for unhappy people.
Now I am cautious to spend time with people who may bring me back to my old habits: regular binge drinkers and drug addicts of thinking small and hopelessness: women who hate women (‘I just don’t get along with girls they cause too much drama tee hee’), people who think it’s cute and fun to put me down and those people who just moan constantly and make me feel like an arsehole for having a sense of humour.
Like I said, I don’t think these are bad people and I don’t think I’m better than them, but I’ve found that I have a lot more energy and am much happier now I don’t have them around. It felt like I was haemoggaging energy and they were sucking it permanently out of me. I feel like I have more to give to the other people in my life and I love to see people buzz off my company now instead of draining people because I am so negative and angry. Talking about my plans and dreams and things I’m proud of is encouraging those around me to do the same and I love it! I’ve started attracting a lot of new people.
Most of all, I feel like I can contribute more to my little boys.
If you want to try this yourself I’d suggest writing a list of people who make you feel worse about yourself after you spend time with them and people who make you feel excited, positive and relaxed after you spend time with them. Chase the positive experiences in life more. There is nothing you can’t do in life and you need to be around people who make you believe that.